Foster mum, Abbey, 32, didn’t expect to be fostering as a single parent but with support from friends and family she has created a loving and stable home for two siblings who now call her ‘Mummy’.
After learning she couldn’t have children with her ex-husband Abbey looked into other ways of parenting.
Abbey said: “I’ve always wanted to look after kids and when my sister was born there was a big age gap - I raised her, so I knew I’d be a good mum. I knew I had the capacity to love children who weren’t my own and when I found out more about fostering it was an easy decision."
When she started her fostering journey with FCA Eastern, Abbey didn’t expect to be flying solo a few years later, she said: "I worried about what would happen to the children when we went through the divorce and that I wouldn't be able to continue fostering the children on my own, but the children’s social worker saw how settled they were and didn't want to disrupt that.
“It's important people know they can go through their own struggles and still be a good foster parent."
The two children Abbey fosters are with her on a permanent basis, but she fostered several children temporarily before this. Building an emotional connection with foster children is an essential part of the process even if they’re only with you for a short time.
Abbey said: “I have cried for every single child, but that’s okay. If I didn’t get attached, I wouldn’t be doing my job properly. You have to throw yourself into it; otherwise, it won’t work because there is no room for the children to feel safe and comfortable.”
After a tough start to life Abbey says her foster children are now ‘like completely different children,’ she said: My journey has had a lot of ups and downs, but when children who've had a difficult start to life make recognisable progress, and you step back and think, 'I did that', it makes it all worthwhile."
In Suffolk there are close to 1,000 children in care. This number continues to grow so more foster parents are needed to provide stable, loving homes for some of the country’s most vulnerable children and young people.
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