“It is the most rewarding thing you can do in your lifetime so if you want to do it, go for it”

Reflecting on one particular moment that has stuck out to Anne in her 22 years of fostering, she said: “I actually attended the wedding of the foster child who was with me for eight years and at the wedding, he paid thanks to me. It was honestly such a lovely and rewarding moment to be part of.

“Before he came to me, he was a high achiever at school. Due to his distressing home life, he put all his energy into schoolwork however, when I started looking after him, his academic achievements went down. I know this was because he was finally able to relax and begin putting his energy into his life and just living. I took that as a massive win in my eyes.”

Later in her fostering career, parent and child placements took more of an interest in Anne’s life. “I felt a sense of connection with parent and child placements, perhaps it was because I was a birth parent myself. From one of my first ever placements with the local authorities, a teenage mum came to me, and it really opened my eyes on how I can help in this area. What I’m trying to do is not only give children a second chance but to allow parents the chance to be the best parent they can be.”

“It is hard to give young parents advice as they don’t always listen, but you must remember you are part of their team. We as foster carers are here to help the best we can.”

Being a single carer proved harder to Anne than she had initially expected. Anne said: “Personally for me, sometimes friends outside of fostering didn’t really understand how these children and young people can be especially with their challenging behaviours. Often, I had to decline going round for a cup of tea which felt quite self-isolating at times. At the end of the day, these children need your full undivided attention above anything else.”

To overcome this, Anne said a good support network makes all the difference. “Attending FCA sessions and having the support from other foster carers really helped me overcome this challenge. I knew they were going through the same things as I was, and I didn’t feel alone.”

After COVID-19 greatly impacted her personal life, Anne took the time and came to the realisation that her fostering journey had come to a natural end. Anne said: “It has been an amazing 22 years and I still have friends who are still in the fostering community. There are a lot of highs and lows with fostering and when you have been through all sorts together, those friendships will remain in my life forever.”

Sharing her advice to those looking to become a foster carer, Anne said: “You have to be a relaxed person. You must be a good listener. But most of all, you must be a team player.  Fostering cannot be done in isolation. I learned the hard way so learn through my experience and make sure you take full advantage of the support network FCA provides.

“Fostering is a journey you start off not really knowing much about but in the end, it enriches your life more than you can imagine. It is the most rewarding thing you can do in your lifetime so if you want to do it, go for it.”