This October marks The Fostering Network’s Sons and Daughters Month, an annual campaign highlighting the important role children of foster carers play in a fostering household.
Fostering has so many positive effects on the children and young people whose parents foster. It can offer an enriching experience where they can see life from another’s perspective, helping them to develop strong caring and empathy skills. They also benefit from an extended support network, with access to organised activities and events – all whilst making lifelong friends in the process.
At FCA, we are proud of the amazing contribution the children of our foster parents make in helping a foster child feel safe and welcomed into their new home.
A birth son of one of our foster parent’s shares his experience of what is was like at first to welcome a younger sibling group of 3 fostered children in his family.
“In the beginning of my parents becoming foster parents, I must admit, I was not sure about it, just as I can safely say, my brothers were not so sure either. Of course, I did not see the reasoning of it this way at the time, but now upon reflection, not only would we have to compete for the time and affection of our parents with each other, but with another set of siblings that we knew nothing about. I was concerned, not only for ourselves but for our parents too with the complicated and mammoth task of raising two sets of siblings.
During the first few months, it was difficult with the glaring differences between the sets. I remember sitting down and trying to help my new foster siblings with their fractions homework and being astounded and frustrated at their inability to focus and to grasp the concepts required that I was trying so hard to teach. However, my frustrations would not show in the same way that theirs did, something for which I owe a giant debt of gratitude to my parents. They taught me how to see from another perspective and to realise that we don’t all have loving parents present from the start. I saw the way my parents had been with me growing up, teaching the same ways to these children when they were showing their frustrations. It was completely eye-opening. And before long, my parents would teach the same thing about patience, respect, and above all else, how to be part of a loving family to these children.
Whilst it may have been difficult, to begin with, at the time, I couldn’t imagine that these two sets of siblings would be integrated by my incredible parents into one family. That I would go home to visit my family and my sister would tell me how amazing she has done at school and would be going to university. It seemed unimaginable in the beginning, sitting and painstakingly going over fractions; that, the youngest would be going to university, the middle brother would be at university for law, the oldest would be working a full-time job living in his own home.
Overall, I am not only proud of my siblings for the journey they have overcome, but I am incredibly proud of the job my parents did with all six of us. To be able to do what they did, to have the patience, the knowledge, the determination, and, the passion to be what they were and still are to all six of us is something I can only hope to be; a great parent.”
How will fostering affect my family
When considering fostering, it’s natural to worry about how your children will be impacted. We understand it may be a big adjustment, that’s why we ensure all children and young people feel listened too, understood and can have their say. We offer comprehensive support, advice and therapy to ensure everyone feels included and part of the FCA family.
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