“Fostering is hard work but completely worth it.”

“Although we had weekly contact arranged with our birth mum, it was often unpredictable as she wasn’t reliable. Eventually, we, as children decided we didn’t want to continue with the contact, so it stopped. We did have contact with our birth father but by that point he had a new partner, so it wasn’t sustained. When I got older and after I had my child, I did get in touch with my birth mother again. Having my own child brought up many curiosities, and I wanted to understand what kind of person she was. We stayed in touch for a couple of years until she passed away.’

“From the very first day I stepped inside my mum and dad’s house, I knew that fostering was the life I wanted. My husband and I met when we were quite young, he knew I had been in care and was adopted and supported my vision to foster. Our children grew up spending time at my mum and dads house so fostering was a part of their upbringing too. We would sometimes look after their foster children at our house when my mum and dad had to go out somewhere. When we decided to foster our children were fully supportive and knew what to expect. They had already seen and understood fostering, so they were more than happy about our decision. Of course, my mum was really happy that we were following in her footsteps. Nobody doubted our decision to foster; it was something we had always planned to do, so there were no surprises or doubts from anyone.’

“Fostering became a true possibility when we moved to our house in Norfolk and we realised that we could make extra bedrooms so we started the process.’

“As my mum fostered and she recommended that we go to an agency because you get a lot more support and help. I Googled and FCA came up in the search results. I contacted FCA and they made me feel that fostering is something I could do because I was fostered. The Form F assessment was very in depth literally dissecting our lives. But at the same time, it was also really good almost like a therapy session going over everything including my feeling around my birth mother and father and being adopted. It was really good for me to be able to talk about that.’

“Our boys were aged nine and 12 and a half when our first foster child came to live with us. He arrived as an emergency placement, despite having limited information we immediately agreed. The first week was challenging as we adjusted to new dynamics, house rules and learned about our foster child’s complex behaviours and needs but our boys thought he was great. Of course, there were challenging times. After he moved on, we welcomed three more children into our home, each staying with us for varying periods throughout our fostering journey. Over the years, we have kept in touch with most of the children we fostered, many of whom are now adults.’

“We attended a support group meeting, two social workers were mentioned the need for a foster home for two sisters, aged six and nine. At that point didn’t have any foster children with us, so we decided to meet them. We instantly fell in love with them and said yes. Now aged 11 and 14 they are with us long term.”
“I think my biggest challenges has been making the decisions to end placements. That was the hardest thing to do. It’s heart breaking. There are so many children that me and my husband would have absolutely no problems coping with but it’s not just about us, it’s about our other children if they can cope. Even though it has been tough at times it is those moments when we go on holiday and seeing the children having an amazing time and they’re just happy and they’re just being children. That part is just the best.”
Rozanne talks about the support from FCA. “Obviously, there is your supervising social worker and if you have any issues or problems you can call them. But there is also a whole team of people too which is amazing. FCA also host different events and activities for the whole family to enjoy. We attended a summer activity day and my girls absolutely loved it.’

“Summing up my fostering experience so far, I would say it has been hard work, but completely worth it. I think once you get the right match for your family and it does just become family, not fostering. That’s what we’ve got at the minute. We’re just family and sometimes I have to do some paperwork.’

If you are thinking of fostering 100% do it.

‘My advice is don’t give up at the first hurdle. The matching process is crucial, and you don’t have to accept every child that has been referred to you. Ensure that the child will fit well with your family, as this can be one of the best decisions you ever make. Rely on your support system, whether it’s FCA, your family, or other available resources. The beginning of this journey can be challenging, and self-doubt is normal. However, talking to people and seeking support can help you overcome the initial tough period.’